You ll Grow Out of It

You ll Grow Out of It
Author: Jessi Klein
Release: 2016-07-12
Editor: Grand Central Publishing
Pages: 304
ISBN: 9781455531196
Language: en
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PEOPLE'S BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR! ONE OF NEW YORK TIMES' NOTABLE BOOKS OF 2016!INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES AND USA TODAY BESTSELLER! YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT hilariously, and candidly, explores the journey of the twenty-first century woman. As both a tomboy and a late bloomer, comedian Jessi Klein grew up feeling more like an outsider than a participant in the rites of modern femininity. In YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT, Klein offers-through an incisive collection of real-life stories-a relentlessly funny yet poignant take on a variety of topics she has experienced along her strange journey to womanhood and beyond. These include her "transformation from Pippi Longstocking-esque tomboy to are-you-a-lesbian-or-what tom man," attempting to find watchable porn, and identifying the difference between being called "ma'am" and "miss" ("Miss sounds like you weigh ninety-nine pounds"). Raw, relatable, and consistently hilarious, YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT is a one-of-a-kind book by a singular and irresistible comic voice.

You ll Grow Out of It

You ll Grow Out of It
Author: Jessi Klein
Release: 2016-08-01
Editor: Nero
Pages: 256
ISBN: 9781863958653
Language: en
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Introducing the prose of Jessi Klein, a Nora Ephron for a new generation. Both a tomboy and a late bloomer, Jessi grew up always feeling like more of an observer than a participant in the rites of modern femininity. You’ll Grow Out Of It is a riotous and incisive collection of real life stories in which Klein explores the milestones of the twenty first century woman: from trying to sculpt the perfect butt (one that looks like two floating tennis balls), to attempting to find watchable porn (the kind where no one cries), to deconstructing Oprah's obsession with taking baths (there's no place on dry land where women are left alone.) You’ll Grow Out Of It is hilarious, relatable and refreshingly candid. ‘You’ll Grow Out Of It does an amazing job making me understand what my life might be like if I were a woman. Or if I were Jessi Klein. I laughed. Lots. Not at what it’s like to be a woman! That would be sexist. I laughed at the parts that you’re supposed to. Which are plentiful. Because Jessi Klein is truly really funny.’ —Ira Glass, Host & producer of This American Life ‘Jessi Klein is a brilliant comedic mind and this book is a perfect reflection of that. It's like having a glass of wine with the best friend you wish you had.’ —Amy Schumer

You ll Grow Out of It

You ll Grow Out of It
Author: Jessi Klein
Release: 2016-09-15
Editor: Hachette UK
Pages: 352
ISBN: 9781473650640
Language: en
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THE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES TOP 10 BESTSELLER 'Jessi Klein is a brilliant comedic mind and this book is a perfect reflection of that. It's like having a glass of wine with the best friend you wish you had' -Amy Schumer As both a tomboy and a late bloomer, comedian Jessi Klein grew up feeling more like an outsider than a participant in the rites of modern femininity. In YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT, Klein offers-through an incisive collection of real-life stories-a relentlessly funny yet poignant take on a variety of topics she has experienced along her strange journey to womanhood and beyond. These include her "transformation from Pippi Longstocking-esque tomboy to are-you-a-lesbian-or-what tom man," attempting to find watchable porn, and identifying the difference between being called 'ma'am' and 'miss' ('Miss sounds like you weigh ninety-nine pounds'). Raw, relatable, and consistently hilarious, YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT is a one-of-a-kind book by a singular and irresistible comic voice.

Love You Forever

Love You Forever
Author: Robert N. Munsch
Release: 1986
Editor: Firefly Books
Pages: 32
ISBN: 0920668372
Language: en
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As her son grows up from little boy to adult man, a mother secretly rocks him each night as he sleeps.

I ll Show Myself Out

I ll Show Myself Out
Author: Jessi Klein
Release: 2022-04-12
Editor: Harper
Pages: 384
ISBN: 0062981595
Language: en
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"Jessi Klein is a brilliant comedic mind."--Amy Schumer The eagerly anticipated second essay collection from Jessi Klein, author of the acclaimed New York Times bestselling debut You'll Grow Out of It. "Sometimes I think about how much bad news there is to tell my kid, the endlessly long, looping CVS receipt scroll of truly terrible things that have happened, and I want to get under the bed and never come out. How do we tell them about all this? Can we just play Billy Joel's We Didn't Start the Fire and then brace for questions? The first of which should be, how is this a song that played on the radio?" In New York Times bestselling author and Emmy Award-winning writer and producer Jessi Klein's second collection, she hilariously explodes the cultural myths and impossible expectations around motherhood and explore the humiliations, poignancies, and possibilities of midlife. In interconnected essays like "Listening to Beyoncé in the Parking Lot of Party City," "Your Husband Will Remarry Five Minutes After You Die," "Eulogy for My Feet," and "An Open Love Letter to Nate Berkus and Jeremiah Brent," Klein explores this stage of life in all its cruel ironies, joyous moments, and bittersweetness. Written with Klein's signature candor and humanity, I'll Show Myself Out is an incisive, moving, and often uproarious collection.

Why I Let My Hair Grow Out

Why I Let My Hair Grow Out
Author: Maryrose Wood
Release: 2007
Editor: Penguin
Pages: 218
ISBN: 0425213803
Language: en
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On a bike trip in Ireland trying to recover from a broken heart, sixteen-year-old Morgan is transformed, not only by the others on the tour, but by her visits to the past, where she is believed to be the legendary half-goddess Morganne, sent to help end a faery curse.

Gardens of the Moon

Gardens of the Moon
Author: Steven Erikson
Release: 2004-06-01
Editor: Macmillan
Pages: 496
ISBN: 9781429926584
Language: en
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Vast legions of gods, mages, humans, dragons and all manner of creatures play out the fate of the Malazan Empire in this first book in a major epic fantasy series The Malazan Empire simmers with discontent, bled dry by interminable warfare, bitter infighting and bloody confrontations with the formidable Anomander Rake and his Tiste Andii, ancient and implacable sorcerers. Even the imperial legions, long inured to the bloodshed, yearn for some respite. Yet Empress Laseen's rule remains absolute, enforced by her dread Claw assassins. For Sergeant Whiskeyjack and his squad of Bridgeburners, and for Tattersail, surviving cadre mage of the Second Legion, the aftermath of the siege of Pale should have been a time to mourn the many dead. But Darujhistan, last of the Free Cities of Genabackis, yet holds out. It is to this ancient citadel that Laseen turns her predatory gaze. However, it would appear that the Empire is not alone in this great game. Sinister, shadowbound forces are gathering as the gods themselves prepare to play their hand... Conceived and written on a panoramic scale, Gardens of the Moon is epic fantasy of the highest order--an enthralling adventure by an outstanding new voice. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

Some Girls

Some Girls
Author: Jillian Lauren
Release: 2010-04-27
Editor: Penguin
Pages: 352
ISBN: 9781101404447
Language: en
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A jaw-dropping story of how a girl from the suburbs ends up in a prince's harem, and emerges from the secret Xanadu both richer and wiser At eighteen, Jillian Lauren was an NYU theater school dropout with a tip about an upcoming audition. The "casting director" told her that a rich businessman in Singapore would pay pretty American girls $20,000 if they stayed for two weeks to spice up his parties. Soon, Jillian was on a plane to Borneo, where she would spend the next eighteen months in the harem of Prince Jefri Bolkiah, youngest brother of the Sultan of Brunei, leaving behind her gritty East Village apartment for a palace with rugs laced with gold and trading her band of artist friends for a coterie of backstabbing beauties. More than just a sexy read set in an exotic land, Some Girls is also the story of how a rebellious teen found herself-and the courage to meet her birth mother and eventually adopt a baby boy.

Idiot

Idiot
Author: Laura Clery
Release: 2020-12-01
Editor: Gallery Books
Pages: 256
ISBN: 9781982101954
Language: en
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From nationally bestselling author, YouTube star, and Facebook Video sensation Laura Clery comes a collection of comedic essays that paint “an honest, complicated portrait of how your life can change” (SheKnows). Laura Clery makes a living by sharing inappropriate comedy sketches with millions of strangers on the internet. She writes songs about her anatomy, talks trash about her one-eyed rescue pug, and sexually harasses her husband, Stephen. And it pays the bills! Now, in her first-ever book, Laura recounts how she went from being a dangerously impulsive, broke, unemployable, suicidal, cocaine-addicted narcissist, crippled by fear and hopping from one toxic romance to the next…to a more-happy-than-not, somewhat rational, meditating, vegan yogi with good credit, a great marriage, a fantastic career, and four unfortunate-looking rescue animals. Still, above all, Laura remains an amazingly talented, adorable, and vulnerable, self-described…Idiot. With her signature brand of offbeat, no-holds-barred humor, Idiot introduces you to a wildly original—and undeniably relatable—new voice.

The New One

The New One
Author: Mike Birbiglia
Release: 2020-06-16
Editor: Grand Central Publishing
Pages: 256
ISBN: 9781538701539
Language: en
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With laugh-out-loud funny parenting observations, the New York Times bestselling author and award-winning comedian delivers a book that is perfect for anyone who has ever raised a child, been a child, or refuses to stop acting like one. In 2016 comedian Mike Birbiglia and poet Jennifer Hope Stein took their fourteen-month-old daughter Oona to the Nantucket Film Festival. When the festival director picked them up at the airport she asked Mike if he would perform at the storytelling night. She said, "The theme of the stories is jealousy." Jen quipped, "You're jealous of Oona. You should talk about that." And so Mike began sharing some of his darkest and funniest thoughts about the decision to have a child. Jen and Mike revealed to each other their sides of what had gone down during Jen's pregnancy and that first year with their child. Over the next couple years, these stories evolved into a Broadway show, and the more Mike performed it the more he heard how it resonated—not just with parents but also people who resist all kinds of change. So he pored over his journals, dug deeper, and created this book: The New One: Painfully True Stories From a Reluctant Dad. Along with hilarious and poignant stories he has never shared before, these pages are sprinkled with poetry Jen wrote as she navigated the same rocky shores of new parenthood. So here it is. This book is an experiment—sort of like a family.

Hey Ladies

Hey Ladies
Author: Michelle Markowitz,Caroline Moss
Release: 2018-05-01
Editor: Abrams
Pages: 272
ISBN: 9781683352372
Language: en
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Based on the column of the same name that appeared in The Toast, Hey Ladies! is a laugh-out-loud read that follows a fictitious group of eight 20-and-30-something female friends for one year of holidays, summer house rentals, dates, brunches, breakups, and, of course, the planning of a disastrous wedding. This instantly relatable story is told entirely through emails, texts, DMs, and every other form of communication known to man. The women in the book are stand-ins for annoying friends that we all have. There’s Nicole, who’s always broke and tries to pay for things in Forever21 gift cards. There’s Katie, the self-important budding journalist, who thinks a retweet and a byline are the same thing. And there’s Jen, the DIY suburban bride-to-be. With a perfectly pitched sardonic tone, Hey Ladies! will have you cringing and laughing as you recognize your own friends, and even yourself.

You ll Soon Grow into Them Titch

You ll Soon Grow into Them  Titch
Author: Pat Hutchins
Release: 1992-03-31
Editor: Harper Collins
Pages: 32
ISBN: 9780688115074
Language: en
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When little Titch outgrows his clothes, he receives hand-me-downs from his brother and sister that are too big. "You'll soon grow into them," they say. But Mother decrees that Titch needs some brand-new clothes. Soon it is his turn to say to someone else the words he has heard so often.

One Day We ll All Be Dead and None of This Will Matter

One Day We ll All Be Dead and None of This Will Matter
Author: Scaachi Koul
Release: 2017-03-07
Editor: Doubleday Canada
Pages: 288
ISBN: 9780385685368
Language: en
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**National Bestseller **A New York Times Book Review Editors' Choice **A Globe and Mail Best Book of 2017 **A National Post Best Book of 2017 **A CBC Best Book of 2017 **An Amazon Best Book of 2017 **A Popsugar Best Book of 2017 **A Kobo Best Book of 2017 **An NPR Best Book of 2017 **A Chatelaine Best Book of 2017 **A Buzzfeed Best Book of 2017 **A Book Riot Best Book of 2017 **A Chicago Review of Books Best Book of 2017 **A Paste Best Book of 2017 **An Amazon Best Humour and Entertainment Book of 2017 **Finalist for the 2018 Kobo Emerging Writer Prize **Finalist for the 2018 Stephen Leacock Memorial Medal for Humour **Nominated for the 2017 Goodreads Choice Award For readers of Mindy Kaling, Jenny Lawson and Roxane Gay, a debut collection of fierce and funny essays about growing up the daughter of Indian immigrants in Canada, "a land of ice and casual racism," by the irreverent, hilarious cultural observer and incomparable rising star, Scaachi Koul. In One Day We’ll All Be Dead and None of This Will Matter, Scaachi deploys her razor-sharp humour to share her fears, outrages and mortifying experiences as an outsider growing up in Canada. Her subjects range from shaving her knuckles in grade school, to a shopping trip gone horribly awry, to dealing with internet trolls, to feeling out of place at an Indian wedding (as an Indian woman), to parsing the trajectory of fears and anxieties that pressed upon her immigrant parents and bled down a generation. Alongside these personal stories are pointed observations about life as a woman of colour, where every aspect of her appearance is open for critique, derision or outright scorn. Where strict gender rules bind in both Western and Indian cultures, forcing her to confront questions about gender dynamics, racial tensions, ethnic stereotypes and her father’s creeping mortality—all as she tries to find her feet in the world. With a clear eye and biting wit, Scaachi Koul explores the absurdity of a life steeped in misery. And through these intimate, wise and laugh-out-loud funny dispatches, a portrait of a bright new literary voice emerges.

It Ends with Us

It Ends with Us
Author: Colleen Hoover
Release: 2020-07-28
Editor: Pocket Books
Pages: 448
ISBN: 9781982143657
Language: en
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In this “brave and heartbreaking novel that digs its claws into you and doesn’t let go, long after you’ve finished it” (Anna Todd, New York Times bestselling author) from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of All Your Perfects, a workaholic with a too-good-to-be-true romance can’t stop thinking about her first love. Lily hasn’t always had it easy, but that’s never stopped her from working hard for the life she wants. She’s come a long way from the small town where she grew up—she graduated from college, moved to Boston, and started her own business. And when she feels a spark with a gorgeous neurosurgeon named Ryle Kincaid, everything in Lily’s life seems too good to be true. Ryle is assertive, stubborn, maybe even a little arrogant. He’s also sensitive, brilliant, and has a total soft spot for Lily. And the way he looks in scrubs certainly doesn’t hurt. Lily can’t get him out of her head. But Ryle’s complete aversion to relationships is disturbing. Even as Lily finds herself becoming the exception to his “no dating” rule, she can’t help but wonder what made him that way in the first place. As questions about her new relationship overwhelm her, so do thoughts of Atlas Corrigan—her first love and a link to the past she left behind. He was her kindred spirit, her protector. When Atlas suddenly reappears, everything Lily has built with Ryle is threatened. An honest, evocative, and tender novel, It Ends with Us is “a glorious and touching read, a forever keeper. The kind of book that gets handed down” (USA TODAY).

Notes to Self

Notes to Self
Author: Emilie Pine
Release: 2019-06-11
Editor: Dial Press Trade Paperback
Pages: 192
ISBN: 9781984855459
Language: en
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The international sensation that illuminates the experiences women are supposed to hide—from addiction, anger, sexual assault, and infertility to joy, sensuality, and love. WINNER OF THE AN POST IRISH BOOK OF THE YEAR • “Emilie Pine’s voice is razor-sharp and raw; her story is utterly original yet as familiar as my own breath.”—Glennon Doyle, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Love Warrior In this dazzling debut, Emilie Pine speaks to the events that have marked her life—those emotional disruptions for which our society has no adequate language, at once bittersweet, clandestine, and ordinary. She writes with radical honesty on the unspeakable grief of infertility, on caring for an alcoholic parent, on taboos around female bodies and female pain, on sexual violence and violence against the self. This is the story of one woman, and of all women. Devastating, poignant, and wise—and joyful against the odds—Notes to Self is an unforgettable exploration of what it feels like to be alive, and a daring act of rebellion against a society that is more comfortable with women’s silence. Praise for Notes to Self “Notes to Self begins as a deceptively simple catalogue of the injustices of modern female life and slyly emerges as a screaming treatise on just what it means to make your own rules, turning the hand you’ve been dealt into the coolest game in town. Emilie Pine is like your best friend—if your best friend was so sharp she drew blood.”—Lena Dunham, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Not That Kind of Girl “To read these essays is to understand the human condition more clearly, to reassess one’s place in the world, and to reclaim one’s own experiences as real and valid.”—Sunday Independent “Harrowing, clear-eyed . . . Everyone should consider [this] priority reading.”—Sunday Business Post “Incredible and insightful—an absolute must-read.”—The Skinny “Agonizing, uncompromising, starkly brilliant. . . . [A] short, gleamingly instructive book, both memoir and psychological exploration—a platform for that insistent internal voice that almost any woman . . . wishes they had ignored.”—Financial Times “Do not read this book in public. It will make you cry.”—Anne Enright

The Wonderful Things You Will Be Deluxe Edition

The Wonderful Things You Will Be  Deluxe Edition
Author: Emily Winfield Martin
Release: 2019-03-26
Editor: Random House Books for Young Readers
Pages: 44
ISBN: 9781984848819
Language: en
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A gorgeous slipcased edition of the essential New York Times bestseller--perfect as a gift for anyone beginning something new! This gorgeous gift edition of Emily Winfield Martin's modern classic poem will elevate any special occasion! With extra pages designed to be personalized with notes from friends and family, this volume is sure to be treasured and revisited often. From brave and bold to creative and clever, Emily Winfield Martin celebrates all personalities and their potential. With a beautiful gatefold, gorgeous and moving illustrations, and a rhyming text, this is a book that parents will love reading over and over to their kids--both younger and older. It's a great gift for any occasion, but a standout for birthdays, baby showers, and graduation with its loving and inspiring message: Then I'll look at you, And you'll look at me, And I'll love you, Whoever you've grown up to be.

Girls in White Dresses

Girls in White Dresses
Author: Jennifer Close
Release: 2011-08-09
Editor: Vintage
Pages: 304
ISBN: 9780307700414
Language: en
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Wickedly hilarious and utterly recognizable, Girls in White Dresses tells the story of three women grappling with heartbreak and career change, family pressure and new love—all while suffering through an endless round of weddings and bridal showers. Isabella, Mary, and Lauren feel like everyone they know is getting married. On Sunday after Sunday, at bridal shower after bridal shower, they coo over toasters, collect ribbons and wrapping paper, eat minuscule sandwiches and doll-sized cakes. They wear pastel dresses and drink champagne by the case, but amid the celebration these women have their own lives to contend with: Isabella is working at a mailing-list company, dizzy with the mixed signals of a boss who claims she’s on a diet but has Isabella file all morning if she forgets to bring her a chocolate muffin. Mary thinks she might cry with happiness when she finally meets a nice guy who loves his mother, only to realize he’ll never love Mary quite as much. And Lauren, a waitress at a Midtown bar, swears up and down she won’t fall for the sleazy bartender—a promise that his dirty blond curls and perfect vodka sodas make hard to keep. With a wry sense of humor, Jennifer Close brings us through those thrilling, bewildering, what-on-earth-am-I-going-to-do-with-my-life years of early adulthood. These are the years when everyone else seems to have a plan, a great job, and an appropriate boyfriend, while Isabella has a blind date with a gay man, Mary has a crush on her boss, and Lauren has a goldfish named Willard. Through boozy family holidays and disastrous ski vacations, relationships lost to politics and relationships found in pet stores, Girls in White Dresses pulls us deep inside the circle of these friends, perfectly capturing the wild frustrations and soaring joys of modern life. BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Jennifer Close's The Smart One.

It s Kind of a Funny Story

It s Kind of a Funny Story
Author: Ned Vizzini
Release: 2010-09-25
Editor: Disney Electronic Content
Pages: 448
ISBN: 9781423141082
Language: en
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Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan's Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That's when things start to get crazy. At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he's just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away.

Science For Her

Science   For Her
Author: Megan Amram
Release: 2014-11-04
Editor: Simon and Schuster
Pages: 224
ISBN: 9781476757889
Language: en
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An irreverent "textbook" for women by a Parks and Recreation writer parodies popular women's magazines, spoofing perky self-improvement tips with advice on everything from glamorous ways to die to choosing a religion for one's body type. 100,000 first printing. Illustrations. Tour.

Cool Calm Contentious

Cool  Calm   Contentious
Author: Merrill Markoe
Release: 2012
Editor: Villard Books
Pages: 287
ISBN: 9780345518927
Language: en
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“This is so well written. [When a book like this] comes along, it’s, like, ‘Thank you!’ What a great way to spend an afternoon, an evening, reading these essays. . . . Absolutely great.”—Jon Stewart “[Merrill] Markoe is easily as funny as David Sedaris. She’s capable of manic riffs and acerbic skewering. Still, her good nature shines through.”—The Washington Post In this hilarious collection of candid essays, including two pieces new to this edition,New York Timesbestselling author Merrill Markoe reveals much about her personal life—as well as the secret formula for comedy: Start out with a difficult mother, develop some classic teenage insecurities, add a few relationships with narcissistic men, toss in an unruly pack of selfish dogs, finish it off with the kind of crystalline perspective that only comes from years of navigating a roiling sea of unpleasant and unappeasable people, and—voilà—you’re funny!Cool, Calm & Contentiousis honest, unapologetic, sometimes heartbreaking, but always shot through with Merrill Markoe’s biting, bracing wit. “This has been a great year for funny women. . . . Let’s call Tina Fey and Mindy Kaling exhibits A and B. Both owe a debt to those who came before, including Merrill Markoe.”—The Boston Globe “Markoe’s goal is to find the absurdity in everyday life. That, coupled with her sharp wit, makes her writing sublime.”—BookPage “Laugh-out-loud humor.”—Tampa Bay Times “Not only crazy-funny, but crazy-heartbreaking.”—The New York Times